Let's Lay...

The first part of Let's Lay is posted at www.jennifernshannon.com...

...Find ourselves tussling
Underneath the covers
Grabbing
Touching
Kissing
Embracing
Sucking
Tasting
Scratching
Hair tugging
Head grabbing
Thrusting
Whispering
Moans
and curses
Softly in one another’s ear,
Seeing for the first time
All that we are
How well we fit
How connected we've become,
Holding on
Tightly
Until we find ecstasy
During moments of
Passionate
Intimate
Lovemaking…

searching...

Been a while sometimes can't find my voice. Hidden beneath life. Noise so loud. Deafening, humiliating, consuming, scary. I am lost within it. Searching.

Scars - continuation...

I can't live up to this standard.
I am just me.
Flawed.
Scared.
Controlled by insecurities.
Buried in a fog of my own selfishness.

In the eyes of everyone around,
I continue missing the mark.
More than a few times.

Who I am,
how I live,
my decisions,
all questioned.

Yet with all the battles
I fight with myself,
despite all the perceptions from others,
I have learned to just love me.
in spite of my scars...

Lost

Words seem to escape me,
somewhere lost in a space that is
crowded
and tired.
Frozen organically between
now and yesterday.

It doesn't matter how tightly my eyes
rest on top of one another,
they alone trying to remember
when speaking was natural
and easy.
When the ability to articulate
flowed through the crack of my lips
like water from a faucet.

But now
Nothing.
No similes
or anecedotes
or clever tricks.
No word play.
No truths.

Just an unexplainable emptiness,
an uneasiness.
A sort of fear
of not being able to express myself.

Perhaps this lost means
it's time to stop being heard
and to start
listening...

Expression

this morning,
i awoke
craving expression,
wanting free
uninhibited
rawness.
yearning for it
even after the darkness
has subsided,
waiting for it's liberation
each time the sunlight
appears...